Cigarettes are Better
(Than Damn Near Everything)

Cigarettes are better than trees,
Because trees provide air, fruit, and beauty.
But cigarettes kill me.
Cigarettes are better than women,
Because women are soft and sweet and sexy.
But cigarettes kill me.
Cigarettes are better than animals,
Because animals provide meat and milk and companionship.
But cigarettes will kill me.
Cigarettes are better than poetry,
Because poetry has meaning and beauty.
But cigarettes will kill me.
Cigarettes are better than life,
Because they kill me.