The 28th Day
Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Helena Bonham Carter, Catherine Zeta-Jones, and Natalie Portman.
Tag line: "It's that (last) time of the month."
Detective Mike Johansen (Schwarzenegger) is the husband of a beautiful wife and the father of two beautiful daughters. He leads a normal life and is relatively happy. One day he finds something in the toilet. This white and crimson harbinger of doom marks the beginning of the end for our hero. Discovering that every 28 days the women in his life become posessed by the blood frothing demon Blu Tung (Christopher Walken) and attempt to destroy all that is human and right, Mike decides to take the cycle of life into his own hands.
Utilizing an arsenal including miniguns, railguns, knives and stabbing weapons, and corks, Mike manages to supress the evil demon and turn the three women into a pile of glop.
The Muppets Take the Whitehouse
Starring: Jim Henson, Jr., Frank Oz, the Muppets.
Tag line: "World domination has a new name." (Under picture of Kermit)
The Muppets are back in this hilarious farce that takes place in our nation's capitol. Deciding that things in America aren't going so well, Kermit "The Frog," notorious French terrorist, realizes it is the perfect time to take over the US government! How can this movie be anything other than hilarious when thirteen highly trained stuffed animals on wires burst into the White House, killing anyone who gets in their way. Taking the president (Christopher Walken) hostage, the Muppets come close to taking over the world, but are stopped just in time when SWAT team snipers take out the puppeteers.
Starring: Tim Allen, Haley Joel Osment
Tag line: "Even Jews deserve a Christmas."
Tim Allen reenacts his role as the Santa Claus who came into the job
by a legal loophole. This time he is shot back in time to 1942 Poland
little Heinrich Judenstein (Osment) is living in a Nazi concentration
Santa takes pity on the little boy and decides to bring him presents to
improve the horrible lifestyle. However, before he can deliver any
Santa must first defeat the Kommandant of the camp (Christopher
escape from a gas chamber, and assassinate Hitler.
Starring: Jean Reno, Robert DeNiro, Laurence Fishbourne, Bruce Willis, Al Pacino, Brad Pitt, Russell Crowe, Steve Buscemi, Michael Clarke Duncan, Woody Harrelson, Vin Diesel, Christopher Walken
Tag line: "Oooooooh..."
Twelve Hollywood celebs sit around a table in a dark room and talk about theology, death, and hurting fetuses.
Stuben in Love
Starring: Stuben the Duck, John Malkovitch, John Goodman, Reese Witherspoon
Tag line: "Just when you thought life was worth living..."
Stuben appears in the first of a trilogy about his life. Shot entirely on location on earth, where the unsuspecting populace is actually murdered in grizzly 3-D fashion. With no direct storyline, Stuben in Love does manage to tell the story of how when Stuben's girlfriend (Witherspoon) leaves him for another duck named Jose, Stuben cuts the loving couple into strips and sells them as buffalo jerky at a local gas station. The cop obsessed with the capture of Stuben (Christopher Walken) will stop at nothing to end his evil empire. Until he is sold as lampshades.