A Guide To Understanding
the Speech Patterns of
the Typical Teenage Female
Homie- One of one’s peers.

Hottie- A young male from 15-25 age who is attractive.
    * Most frequently a male singer/actor.
    * Examples: Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, the Backstreet Boys, or ‘N-Sync

Like- Interjection similar to “uh” or “um.”
    *No real meaning.
    *Used to stall when the speaker cannot think of something to say
    *Also frequently used for no damn reason at all.

Multiplication of syllables- A teenage girl has the ability to take a word with only one or
two syllables and draw it out to five, six, or even seven.
    * Generally said in a whining tone.
    * Example: “Bu-ut, Mo-o-o-o-o-o-o-m-my!”

My bad- “My error,” or, “I have made a mistake. Please forgive me.”

Omigod- This is a contraction of three words, “Oh, my god.”
    * Frequently used with an exclamation point, as the particular phrase is used to
        exhibit surprise.
    * Conversely, it can also be said with one second pauses between each of
        the words.
    * Example: “Oh. My. God.”

Rolling of the eyes- A sign of displeasure.

Sigh- Also a display of displeasure.
    * The sigh is often followed by a derisive pronunciation of the person at whom
        the displeasure is directed.
    * If occapanied by a rolling of the eyes, this is a sign of extreme displeasure.
    * Example: “<Sigh> Motherrrrr!”

So- An adverb/adjective meaning extremely or amazingly.
    * Frequently drawn out to thrice its normal length
    * Example: “She is soooooo lame.”

To go- The various conjugations of this verb are used as a substitute for any verb
        meaning “to speak.”
    * For instance, rather than use “She said, ‘Omigod,’” a teenage female would
        instead speak thusly- “She went, ‘Omigod.’”
    * “Like” can be inserted here as well, as in “She was, like, ‘Omigod.’”

Totally- Another adjective/adverb meaning extremely or amazingly.
    * Example: “She is just totally not with it.”
    * Can also be used as a word of agreement.
    * Example: “So, did you think that he’s a hottie?”

Wassup?- A greeting.
     * A contraction of another popular greeting amongst teenagers, “What’s up?”
     * “What’s up” is itself a contraction of “What is up?”
     * To make this more readily understandable to the typical adult, “How are
        you doing, my friend?”

Whatever- An expression of disbelief in what the other speaker is saying.
     *Pause between “what” and “ever” for roughly one second for maximum effect.

Whining- This particular inflection in a teenaged girl’s voice is an indication of
    * Can also be used for no particular reason.
    * However, if overused, the speaker will not be able to change her tone
        until either the end of adolescence or the administration of a stern lecture.

Word up- “I completely agree.”