Choose Your Own Nuthouse
One of the shapes bounces out of the fog and looks at you. It’s a wee little rabbit, with great big wet brown eyes and a cute little button pink nose.
“Wow. This is really not at all what I expected when I came here.” The bunny is not afraid of you at all and in fact wonders up to you; you stretch out your hand to touch its soft downy fur when it says in one of those over cute Disney voices
“I’ll swallow your soul.”
You draw back your hand and punt the hell spawn into a wall. It makes a fun wet noise as you watch the lifeless bunny slide slowly down the wall of the pit.
“That wasn’t so bad.”
“THAT WAS THE FIRST TEST!” says a mysterious booming voice; the voice is so loud that the walls of the pit shake when it speaks. It shakes so much in fact that you fall on your ass trying to keep you balance.
“Dude! Must you be so loud?”
“I’M NOT BEING LOUD… I CAN BE LOUD IF YOU WISH MORTAL!”
“No that is ok, I’m cool.”
“So what other tests are there down here, cause I get this horrible test anxiety and I don’t do so good on them. OH! And if there are any essay questions count me out! Those are the worst.”
“You know essay questions, you write them out in paragraph form.”
“I KNOW WHAT ESSAY TESTS ARE, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN THEY ARE THE WORST?!? YOU CAN SO BULLSHIT THEM IF NEED BE.”
“No you can’t the teachers always know when you are bullshitin’ them, now multiple choice, that is right up my alley, cause you don’t need to know the answer to get them right.”
“I THINK THAT YOU ARE CONFUSED”
“YES, I BELIEVE YOU ARE”
“No, I am not”
“LOOK, I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS! I’M SUPPOSE TO CONVINCE THE PRESIDENT THAT I’M GOD IN A HOUR, SO CAN WE JUST MOVE ON?”
“You’re not god?”
“WELL I AM A GOD, JUST NOT THE GOD, BUT THAT IS NOT IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW. YOU MUST DECIDE ON WHICH PATH TO GO DOWN IN ORDER TO SEE HOW YOUR LIFE WILL TURN OUT. I MUST WARN YOU THAT TWO OF THE WAYS LEAD TO CERTAIN DEATH!”
“Yay!! A multiple choice question!”
“WHATEVER, NOW CHOOSE!”
In front of you, the mist clears, revealing three paths.